I am starting this blog at the advice of a very wise friend.
I’m tired of living with the “shameful secret” that is my acne. I’m tired of waking up and dreading the mirror. I’m tired of piling on makeup and doing everything I can to not think about my skin constantly throughout the day. I’m tired of bailing out on friends and losing out on relationships because I am not comfortable in my own skin. I’m tired of chasing shadows to hide the newly inflamed pimples on my face. I’m tired of coming up with new excuses not to socialize. I’m sick of paying attention to every little morsel of food that goes into my body just praying that I can eat my skin clear. I’m TIRED. Literally. I don’t sleep well.
I don’t want this blog to be a list of complaints. That’s not what this is about. This is about opening up, for the first time. Going public with my biggest secret that literally will not hide, no matter how much makeup I slather on it. This is about connecting with others who are in my shoes. You are not alone. We are not alone.
I’ll get more into my Skin Deep Story soon, but what I want to say, right now, is that despite everything, I know my acne is my gift. Through this journey I am finding my greater purpose and for that, I am forever grateful.
With that said, this journey is the most difficult thing I have ever endured. Some days, like today for instance, I feel completely hopeless, pessimistic, ugly, alone, ashamed, and simply dreading what tomorrow has to bring. And yet, here I am. I have no choice but to continue. To seek answers, and to try and make the best of each day.
I’m going to end this post with an affirmation and, if you’re reading this and feel like I do, I suggest you do the same. Whether you believe them or not, reciting positive affirmations is incredibly important, especially when you are feeling low. When you change your mind, you change your world. You don’t have to believe it. Just say it. And then, say it again. And again…
You can try mine if you’d like. Or come up with one that speaks to you.
I feel beautiful and free.